A Relationship Story - Shining the Hot Lights on a Leadership Lesson

November 2006

A Relationship Story - Shining the Hot Lights on a Leadership Lesson

A simple view on leadership, and a story to support the ideas…

Leadership is about accomplishing 2 things:

(1) Giving people the feeling that they are trusted and believed in to do what they truly can do.

(2) Creating an environment where people can do #1 above, in a community with others also doing #1 above, and for the community to experience synergy by getting more than the sum of the individual parts.

I just had an amazing experience that drove these simple points home for me better than any ever has:

I have been involved for years in a family theater group in Brea, and the arts leadership in the City decided to produce a play celebrating the very interesting 100+ year history of the community. My Theater-Dad buddies Roger, Chuck, Bob, and I wanted to support our friends in the City and offered to play roles in their show if they needed us (yes, I’ll admit, it’s not as if they would be twisting our amateur-ham arms!). Well, they took us up on our offer and we were cast in the show to work with accomplished Playwright and Director Bill Mittler and a diverse cast that included a bunch of experienced and professional actors. We quickly realized that they were not going to cut us novices the same slack we usually get – they didn’t say “oh they’re just Dads” – this was serious and I was sweating from the start.

As we progressed through the 4 weeks of rehearsals leading up to the performances, I found myself being stretched way beyond my own “clueless rookie” comfort zone, and I kept expecting the guru-like Director to expose me for the imposter that I was. But we just kept on and never got the hook, and I found myself getting more and more comfortable and confident as we progressed toward opening night, even though enduring the inevitable rehearsal meltdown just 2 nights before we were to open. But Bill stuck with me and my pals and never appeared worried that we might sink his show and discredit a brilliant piece of writing. So opening night arrived…and everything went off without a hitch. The run of the show ended up a complete success showcasing Bill’s great story. The Business Observation - based on the endorsement of people he trusted, Bill had confidence that we could do this and do it well, and he treated us as if he trusted us and believed in us…and we succeeded in meeting his expectations while exceeding our own.

There was another fascinating group experience that went along with these individual challenges. A cast in a show (31 people in this case) has to have an enormous amount of faith in each other, trusting that everyone else will do their job well. It is impossible for any individual player to have control over the entire outcome, and while individual failures can sink a show, there is amazing and extraordinary potential that comes from the collective shared trust that a cast experiences. Everyone has to execute individually but always be ready to pick up someone else’s line or react and solve a problem when the unexpected happens. The Business Observation - if Bill the Director and leader had not created an environment where we could thrive individually but also bond in a trusted fashion as a group we would not end up becoming the “family” that it takes to succeed together when the lights come on.

Now take a minute to think about your business environment and ask yourself if this would be the same kind of story that people would tell. Remembering when I was a senior leader in my corporate life I now can see that truly trusting others, releasing control, and creating an environment of shared trust were clearly my toughest leadership challenges. I sort of wish that many years ago I could have reached the insight I just experienced being stretched-but-trusted in Bill’s show. Thanks for sharing your time with me. I welcome your thoughts and impressions; please feel free to share this with others who would get value from these ideas.

A Relationship Story - The Truth and the Trusted Advisor

October 2006

…Consultants telling clients what they want to hear, or worse yet, just regurgitating the client’s own words and getting paid for it. Ever heard that one? Ugh.

A favorite saying of mine goes like this: “Buy it from someone you trust, even if you pay a little more, and you’re sure to have one less worry.” We all have enough worries already.

There’s a big difference between telling the truth with the intent to help versus just saying what will get you paid. It’s truthtelling that defines the real Trusted Advisor. Trust is just too broad and too easy to interpret; it can be far too transactional. Like a friend recently said, trust can be as simple as not counting the coins when you get change. However, Truth is an unquestionable concept, and there is no way to wiggle out of it. It’s either true or it’s not.

In “If Aristotle Ran General Motors”, Tom Morris describes this concept wonderfully, stating that “what you must do is always be true to your own deepest instincts about what the truth is and how it can best be used as the basis for your actions.” Now I’m not suggesting this means you have to be stupid and get yourself beaten up by not recognizing that things sometimes are better left unsaid. However, it reminds us that when we say it, it needs to meet the “looking-in-the-mirror” test.

So let me ask you, in running your business, are you holding your trusted advisors accountable for the truth? Don’t your stakeholders deserve it? And what about those of us who are delivering services and hoping to deserve the trust of clients and partners? Are we meeting the “looking in the mirror test?” After all, beyond the fact that truthtelling is the right thing to do, it’s really just good business. The fact that some people believe otherwise – that truth is just another business “variable” – makes the truth the most compelling of all business discriminators. Make sure it’s yours.

Thanks for sharing your time. I welcome your thoughts and comments. Also, this could be a good centerpiece kind of ethics message that I might offer in a speaking or panel role to support your company or group. I’ve done some great speaking/panel events this year with diverse groups including UCI, Meggitt/Endevco (a client), the Vance Caesar Group, FEI, and OC/MBA, and I would welcome the opportunity to discuss similar ideas you might have. Thanks again.

A Relationship Story - Succeeding in Our Moments of Truth

The Dog Days of Summer 2006

There are subtle, but critical differences between the winner and the also-ran. A great example is something we are all faced with every day in our business lives, and I had a recent reminder of this valuable lesson. It came to me when I was faced with one of those uncontrollable and vexing disasters that seem so much like the sky is falling. You know the kind of moment I mean.

It also happened to be a baseball moment (of course, you say?), but you’ll really get the point here, so hang in with me. It’s not really about baseball.

So my “sky is falling” moment happens one morning, and I turn on the Astros and Tigers game (really, I’m not making this up, I do this on XM Radio) and the great veteran pitcher Andy Pettitte of the Astros is on the mound in a tight game. With 2 outs and runners on first and third, he coaxes the perfect inning-ending ground ball, but the shortstop boots it. Run scores. Pettitte grinds his teeth and you know he’s steamed. Even the veteran, the former World Series star, struggles to maintain his concentration. He walks the next guy to load the bases. He goes to a full count on the next guy: 3 balls, 2 strikes, 2 outs, bases loaded. Now the test has arrived. What will happen next? How will Pettitte react? A bad pitch now and it could be a double to clear the bases and the game would totally slip away. He has to reach down deep to come up with the right pitch. No margin for error. But this is no also-ran, this is a winner. So, when it really counts, Andy Pettitte the winner comes up with a great 3 and 2 pitch - and it’s a weak grounder to end the inning. His team is still in the game.

I was struck by the parallel between this classic ballgame moment and the moments of truth we face every day. I realized that success in business, a world of uncontrollables like the shortstop’s error, is really all about making great 3 and 2 pitches when the bases are loaded. The difference between winning and frustration can often be traced to these key moments, these critical inflection points. It can be about making big go/no-go decisions, or maybe it’s that key opportunity when your insightful comment at the perfect time can create a breakthrough in understanding, or it might be saying just the right thing at the right moment to maintain trust and confidence in a personal relationship. It can be many things, but it all comes down to making great 3 and 2 pitches.

When we are faced with these “sky is falling” moments, the key to success is the very next step we take, it’s the perfect 3 and 2 pitch to save the game. We can’t make the shortstop’s error go away. All we can control is our own behavior and our own next step. Everybody is watching, and that next step really has to be good.

Thanks for sharing your time. I welcome your thoughts and comments.

A quick update on business – I had the pleasure of being recognized for having both the highest revenue and the most new search engagements among McDermott & Bull consultants for both the 1st and 2nd quarters of 2006. I would like to thank all of you who help make this possible through referrals, networking support, and helping to build a positive brand for me and our firm in the market. I will continue to do everything I can to continue trying to help all of you whenever possible. Thank you all!

Sincerely,

Jeff Black
Principal Consultant, McDermott & Bull Executive Search
Cell: (714) 356-1949 Office: (949) 753-1700 ext. 310
2 Venture, Suite 100 Irvine, CA 92618
black@mbsearch.net

A Relationship Story - Putting Priority Where It Really Matters

Like so many of you, things seem to be going well in my business. While that’s exciting and satisfying, I ask myself every day whether I’m doing enough of the right things in the community to reciprocate for this opportunity and privilege. Maybe you are, or should be, asking yourself the same question.

3 seemingly unrelated recent experiences helped bring clarity to something really important:

First - My friend Jose Toves, with whom I've spent countless hours together as volunteers in the community theater along with our kids, recently left his long-time corporate role to seek a more fulfilling and personally-aligned way to spend his professional time. As a reflection of his transition learning, and knowing me and the things I always seem to be talking about like ethics and authenticity, Jose offered me a generous and powerful gift - John C. Maxwell’s book “There’s No Such Thing as ‘Business’ Ethics”. In the book, in discussing the importance and value of living by the Golden Rule, Maxwell describes the importance of priorities. He asks the question: “In 50 or 100 years what are you doing now that will still be important?” Sort of a chilling thought.

Second – I read a compelling book by Barbara Ehrenreich called “Nickle and Dimed – On (Not) Getting By in America”, describing the ridiculous challenges faced by low-wage workers in our society. It helped me realize how easy it is to let poverty be invisible while I go along living my privileged life. I did a little research and learned that:

37 Million Americans are below the “poverty line” -- This is 7 Million more than just 4 years ago – a disturbing trend

40% of annual family incomes are below $35,000 (40%!!!!)

Now, think about how much tougher things are in Orange County and other high cost environments, where low wage jobs are still low wage jobs, but:

• The “Housing Wage” is $21.12/hour (annually $42,000+) for a one-bedroom apartment at the Fair Market Rent. http://www.ocbc.org/pdf/WorkForce05final.pdf
• For perspective - 2 full-time workers in a household, even at a generous $10/hour (beyond many low-wage workers' reach), cannot meet the Housing Wage. Now, how about a single parent?

Third – I heard the song “Gotta Serve Somebody” by Bob Dylan…Very poignant:

You may be an ambassador to England or France, you may like to gamble, you might like to dance, you may be the heavyweight champion of the world, you may be a socialite with a long string of pearls, but you're gonna have to serve somebody, yes indeed you're gonna have to serve somebody.

So here’s the challenge: We are the privileged ones in this society. Are we doing everything we can to make a difference? Each of us needs to ask what we are doing to build up the foundation of our society, generating the strength we need to keep growing, building from within.

Here are some great examples of friends in the market who are helping those who really need help, and thereby building the foundation for a better future for us all:

Rod McDermott – Board Member of THINK Together – Academically-oriented out-of-school programs for young people. http://www.thinktogether.org/home.html
Patricia Sproule – Board Member of The Prentice School – Empowering dyslexic students to build their foundation for success. http://www.prenticeschool.org/
Hal Reisiger – Career Coaching and Counseling Ministry at Saddleback Church - Supporting transitioning professionals in the Saddleback Church family toward their next career opportunity. http://www.saddlebackfamily.com/home/careprayerhelp/article.asp?id=6941

My own example of trying to support the youth and families of Orange County is serving as a Board Member of the YMCA of Orange County. http://www.ymcaoc.org

A Relationship Story - Why People Leave, Why They Stay, and What Companies Can Do About It

May 2006

A Relationship Story - Why People Leave, Why They Stay, and What Companies Can Do About It


Winning the war for talent is challenge #1. And that’s what it is - A War. It’s not the loud kind of war with bombs and bullets, but it’s real just the same. It’s a silent war, and it starts and finishes from the inside of your Company.

Why do people leave, and why do they stay? What’s the difference between companies who feel they are “fighting” the war, and those who have already won it?

Well, I have come to understand a lot about this difference in my search consultancy. Yes, it’s a consultancy, as I don’t feel like I’m a recruiter or that our firm recruits, really. I have come to believe that people are really not “recruited” away from their companies. I believe that people only seriously consider changing jobs, and dealing with the life upheaval that goes along with that decision, when they are at a fulcrum point in their lives. It’s not something people take lightly. I always want to learn about this in interviewing people, as it serves as a centerpiece of their state of mind and their motivation, and it tells a lot about who they really are.

How do people reach these critical inflection points? Why does the timing seem to be right for someone to consider something new?

The 3 Big Misconceptions for Companies

• The best people are inevitably ready to leave
• Our company is at the mercy of this threat
• The best defense is a good offense

The Big Caveat - If companies don’t value people, then the “3 Other Ways to Think” will not work. For those companies, money and resume’ matter a lot. When people are at the center of a company’s success model, the ideas in this story might just make a big difference.

3 Other Ways to Think:

The best people are inevitably ready to leave – WRONG

• People only leave when they have a reason to leave, and the reasons are less about the magnetism of a new opportunity, and more about the loss of magnetism to stay. My experience tells me that their value stream has in some way become misaligned with the value stream of their Company.

Our company is at the mercy of this threat – WRONG, unless you have a bad company

• People hate to be neglected…companies get lost in their problems and forget about continually reconnecting with their people.

-- What people like most about other people: they believe the others like them.

• Your company is in control of whether people feel good being part of your team.

The best defense is a good offense – WRONG, if this seems true, you’ve already lost the war

• Competing for talent solely based on Money, Titles, Options, or Perks is not the answer. These things should all be at the right levels (cheap companies are not necessarily smart companies), but these DO NOT necessarily win the game.
• Companies must evaluate the connection between the Company’s values and the needs/desires/values of the employees.
  -- Companies must know what they are and must articulate it
  -- Employees must be chosen to match the Company’s identity
  -- The view of the future for employees must be aligned with both Company and individual needs
  
  FOR GOOD COMPANIES, THE BEST DEFENSE IS A GOOD ESSENCE!!!

Sincerely,

Jeff Black, Principal Consultant, McDermott & Bull Executive Search black@mbsearch.net

A Relationship Story - An Answer to the "Mystery of Connecting"

March 2006

A Relationship Story
An Answer to the "Mystery of Connecting"

I’ve always wondered what the key was to why I connect personally with some people and not with others (besides the obvious - that many people are kind enough to humor me!). Is it "opposites attract", or is it common interests, or something weird that I don’t understand like biorhythms? And then I learned a lot about natural themes of strength in different people, and this helped me understand how combining diverse talents makes an organization strong, but it didn’t help explain the difference in connecting on a person-to-person basis.

"The Likeability Factor" by Tim Sanders (a big author/thinker for me – he also wrote another favorite about networking and relationships called "Love Is The Killer App") offers insights that help with this big unanswered question.

Have you ever noticed how a person can be extremely pleasant, but they just seem invisible? They might struggle with RELEVANCE - nobody seems to pay attention to them.

Ever know somebody who is pleasant and friendly but who always seems to be on a different page than everyone else? Maybe their problem is they lack EMPATHY – they can’t read what’s going on inside others.

Or how about the person who is bright, cheerful, empathetic, and highly relevant, but who feels they need to please others too much? They might have trouble with REALNESS – they may not be comfortable enough with themselves to be transparent and authentic.

And then, of course, you have your basic jerk that just seems incapable of FRIENDLINESS – they may understand what to say, may behave authentically, and may really read others well, but they just don’t seem to care how other people feel.

Each of these scenarios highlights one of the four factors that Sanders believes make up our Likeability – Friendliness, Relevance, Empathy, and Realness. Now I get it! I can see more clearly the differences between people, and can understand the success or struggle in my own individual connections and relationships. Sadly (but maybe not really), I also understand my own flaws in achieving Likeability and being consistent. My grumpiness and intensity is not all that friendly, my love for hearing myself talk is often not very relevant, and I continue to try to overcome a life as "authenticity challenged"…ouch, but the insight is so valuable.

Take a look around you – and take a look at yourself – and see if you may be able to understand a bit better why some connections seem to work better than others. Even it it’s a bit painful, or if it borders on being too analytical for your liking, at least it offers a re-calibration for us on a more damaging trait – Cluelessness! Might be worth spending a brain cell or two on.

My best to each of you, and I welcome your thoughts and comments.

Book Recommendation: The Likeability Factor by Tim Sanders

Sincerely,

Jeff Black
Principal Consultant
McDermott & Bull Executive
black@mbsearch.net

A Relationship Story - Becoming Untouchable in a Flattening World

The big picture is, of course, interesting and instructive. However, I love it when a really cool nugget of insight provides a practical way for us to take action that might actually help!

February 2006

A Relationship Story

Becoming Untouchable in a Flattening World

Things are changing in our business world in recent years. Did you notice? If not, you’re head is buried very deep. We all need to be aware of the realities of globalization. Thomas Friedman’s book "The World Is Flat" is a great description of the changes that are upon us from beginnings in the mid-80’s, as well as the direction we are heading. There are some chilling observations about how our current behavior will affect our future. Approached from a realistic (and not really political) perspective, the book makes it clear there is no turning back. My daughter just visited China as part of her Semester at Sea trip around the world (how cool is that!), and these changes were very clear even from her youthful perspective, saying "Dad, you had better invest in China!"

The book also talked about ways we can and must take this challenge on. The message was not about impending doom at all. A key point is made about the many things we do in America better than anyone else, but reminds us we must stay vigilant about maintaining these advantages. From an individual standpoint – both for companies and for each of us – we must focus all our efforts on making ourselves Untouchable. We must take action to protect ourselves and become "outsource-proof." This is not a challenge for the faint-of-heart, the unrealistic, or the change-averse.

First, we have to suck it up and prepare for a battle. I’m sorry to break it to you, but we have to compete. No free lunch, no entitlements – unless our choices and actions make it possible.

Second, we have to see ourselves for what we really are, what we are really good at. If "You can’t handle the truth" (see "A Few Good Men"), then you will not recognize where you are really competitive, and you’ll find yourself coming up short all the time.

Finally, we have to pick the right road and stay on it. To quote Ray Baird of the B2B marketing strategy agency RiechesBaird, "the tighter the focus, the stronger the brand." Our objective must be to become a magnet by creating demand for what we offer. We must recognize that we are much more likely to succeed by leveraging our greatest strengths, and we simply must release the peripheral pipe dreams. Trying to be all things to all people is a recipe for failure.

So the best way for us to make the changing world an opportunity and not a threat is to start inside ourselves and our companies, and become Untouchable. Using your true natural tools is the only path to greatness, and greatness is the only path to creating demand for your company, for your products, or for yourself.

I welcome your comments and ideas, and I thank you for your interest.

Book Recommendation: The World Is Flat by Thomas Friedman

Link: http://www.riechesbaird.com/